Tag Archives: father

How I Cope with My Wife’s Stroke and My Son’s Spinal Cord Injury

At age 27, Sean McGonagle was attacked in a shocking act of violence at a bar just two days before Christmas. Shot in the leg and chest, Sean became paralyzed from the chest down. Two years after injury, Sean underwent surgery to remove an abscess on his spinal cord where the bullet had been lodged.

Just four days after his surgery, his mother, Kass, had a stroke that left her with limited mobility and communication skills. Sean and Kass stayed in the same hospital during recovery and pursued rehabilitation at Magee together.

Kass McGonagle Sean McGonagle HelpHOPELive spinal cord injury stroke boat Spirit Philadelphia

Kass and Sean stayed in the same hospital during their recovery.

Father and husband Dennis McGonagle helped to initiate fundraising campaigns with HelpHOPELive to support both Sean and Kass. Dennis explains how his family is living with the lifelong impact of spinal cord injury and stroke.


How is your relationship with your family? 


My relationship with my family is very strong. I retired early so I could be a caregiver for my wife and son, and I have three daughters and three grandchildren that I spend time with. It is very important to all of us to stay close and help each other.

Kass McGonagle Sean McGonagle HelpHOPELive

Dennis, center, retired so he could care for his wife, left, and son.


Why is fundraising important to you?  


Managing health is a minute-to-minute task. We have therapy three times a week, doctors’ appointments and daily care and companionship needs. As a quadriplegic, Sean suffers from a lot of pain and discomfort. Things will not get easier for him as time goes on; as a matter of fact, they will get progressively worse.

Kass McGonagle Sean McGonagle HelpHOPELive

Sean with Joanne from Magee Rehabilitation Hospital

He tries to keep a positive attitude and holds onto the thought that there may be some life-changing medical advancements in his future.

Kass McGonagle Sean McGonagle HelpHOPELive Magee Rehab physical therapy spinal cord injury

Therapy helps Sean cut down on “pain and discomfort” after injury.

For Sean, our last fundraiser was to help him purchase a new wheelchair. We have a long way to go, but the new chair will enable him to stand upright and increase his blood flow. In the long run, it will keep him from getting pressure sores and improve his overall health.

Sean McGonagle fundraising HelpHOPELive comedy hypnosis

Sean fundraises for a new wheelchair and other post-injury costs.

It has been almost three years since Kass’ stroke, and she is dealing with memory loss, speech problems and paralysis on her left side. She is reliant on a wheelchair for mobility support. Kass needs a stair lift to get up and down the staircase safely. We also need to make some modifications to her bathroom to make it safer and more accessible.

Kass McGonagle HelpHOPELive stroke

Kass fundraises with HelpHOPELive for home modifications, mobility needs and more.


How do you feel about fundraising with HelpHOPELive?


We have been in contact with the nonprofit since 2011. HelpHOPELive is a great nonprofit organization. From digital guidance and customized flyers to general understanding, HelpHOPELive has shown us the path to achieve our fundraising goals. We are also glad to have an avenue to allow our community to understand and support our fundraising goals and events.

Wheelchair van Sean McGonagle

“Picking up my new van! This never would have happened without your donations!”


Is it challenging to support a loved one as a caregiver while being a father?


Being a father and a caregiver is always a challenge, and in my case, I am helping to support both my wife and my son. They have similar needs and yet a lot of different individual needs as well. You can’t be in two places at one time, but somehow we have managed so far. Who better than a husband and father to take care of them? The best part about being a dad is the love of your children. A child is a gift and you get an opportunity to watch kids grow into young adults. My children are also my friends, which is very important to a healthy and honest family relationship.

Kass McGonagle Sean McGonagle HelpHOPELive spinal cord injury stroke boat Spirit Philadelphia

Dennis says his family “is more important than any material things.”

Remember that your family is more important than any material things. Remember to always look after and cherish your children. You never know when they will need you the most.


Learn more about Dennis, Kass and Sean at helphopelive.org. Do you know a family struggling to cover the out-of-pocket expenses associated with a catastrophic injury or illness? Learn how we can help with a tax-deductible fundraising campaign and one-on-one support.

Voices of Hope: 5 Things We Learned While Waiting for a Transplant

Allen “Monty” Scott is living with end-stage congestive heart failure. He needs a heart-kidney transplant to live a healthy life. Monty’s wife, Nicole, and his children, Marquise and Talia, have been steadfast sources of support for their father as he’s faced medication changes, hospitalizations, rigorous physical therapy and ongoing health challenges.

You learn to take the good, the bad and the ugly on a journey like this,” wrote Nicole, “but when you wake up the next morning, it’s a brand new day!” Here, Monty and his family members explain what else they’ve learned on the road to transplant.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

Monty, left, with his wife and two children


Your family can be a guiding light while you are waiting for a transplant.


Monty: My family has made this journey easier because I don’t have to experience it alone.

Nicole: We have all been actively involved since his diagnosis 10 years ago. We are a strong support system for him, and our community, church and friends have all been very supportive as well. Enjoy every moment of family time, because it is truly a gift. We are tightly knit and that’s the best part.

Marquise: We give him vitality – reason and motivation to keep moving forward. We make the journey easier for him and do things for him that he might not be able to do for himself right now. In addition to the fundraising, our family and community also raise awareness for heart disease.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

Monty and family attended the 2016 Heart Walk to raise awareness

No matter what challenges you encounter, try to live your life the best you can to leave a good example for your kids. Be there for your kids 110% so your kids will be there for you 110%. Life is good, and it’s about choices. The choice we make about my dad’s condition is to be there with him every step of the way. My dad and I have a great relationship based on trust, love, teaching and admiration. It is awe-inspiring. It’s a relationship I would like to photocopy and build on with my own kids one day.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

“My family has made this journey easier because I don’t have to experience it alone.”

Talia: Whenever we go to the hospital, we always ask questions about how to care for him. We learn about his condition and the medical equipment he needs and we try to absorb it all. You need patience in order to be a father figure for someone. He is always there for us and we can joke around with each other. He always has a bright smile, and I love him. I love the overwhelming amount of strength we have for one another as a family.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

Monty’s family supports him during his transplant preparations


The out-of-pocket expenses will surprise you.


Nicole: During a change in our insurance, medications were running low and running out, and we ended up paying out of pocket for some of those costs. Without the meds, Monty’s health declines quickly and his levels are off, which may require an ER visit or even a trip to Tufts to fix.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

Home health care is among the out-of-pocket costs Monty faces daily

Talia: Our hospital at Tufts is two hours away from where we live, so in addition to fundraising for things that come up unexpectedly, we also fundraise for trips back and forth to the hospital.

Monty: I realized how expensive this journey can be when my insurance was in transition and we were responsible for those additional out-of-pocket costs. Fundraising with HelpHOPELive is fantastic! It helps to bring awareness to my condition while spreading awareness of how HelpHOPELive can help other people.


Staying positive is possible, but it’s not easy.


Monty: It is a blessing to be on the list, but if your wait is long it can weigh heavily on your mind. Stay strong mentally, because you would be surprised how much your mental state can affect your health. I try to keep it all in perspective.

Nicole: When you are actively involved but you can’t do anything to fix it, you feel helpless sometimes. Organ donation can be a difficult decision for some, so there is a limited availability of organs, making the wait long. Sometimes listed patients don’t make it through the wait. It can become depressing, but there are a lot of resources out there that can help; fundraise with HelpHOPELive! The support system around you helps to alleviate some of the burden.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

“Fundraise with HelpHOPELive!” advises Monty’s wife

Marquise: Dealing with a chronic health condition makes your family mature faster, especially the kids. It’s painful. I never can do enough, I feel. It’s even more challenging because it is my father’s heart, the motor of his body. After an egg is fertilized it’s only about a week until that heart starts to beat. It’s scary because you don’t know when or if you are going to get a new heart, whether or not your body will reject that heart and a multitude of other serious concerns.

Talia: You get a little impatient when waiting for a heart because waiting for an organ is not like walking into a store and just buying something off the shelf. There is pain and it hurts and you want to be able to help and you can only do so much. We all deal with the challenges in a way where it doesn’t take so much of a toll on us. You have to try to distract yourself and keep thinking about the good stuff in life.


Rallying your community can provide financial and emotional support.


Monty: Many people have supported me, whether it be through fundraising or just words of encouragement. Parents at my daughter’s school have put together fundraisers and so have my college friends. Our local newspaper kindly wrote my story and it headlined in the paper the next day, drawing awareness to my condition and HelpHOPELive. There are other efforts in progress as well so my community has most definitely shown an outpouring of support.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

The “Lend A Hand For A Heart” fundraiser in honor of Monty

Nicole: At first, when it came to fundraising, I thought, “I don’t want to feel as though we have our hands out.” As we advanced through the process and came across the difficulties and the constant cost of the littlest things adding up, we started thinking rationally. That rational thought is, you just cannot do this alone.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

Monty’s fellow high school alumni support his fundraising efforts

After putting your pride aside, you see the angels that God has put on Earth to help. They come in the form of family, friends, associates, neighbors and strangers. You just can’t see them when you are too proud to accept their help. I like the way that HelpHOPELive is managed, and it legitimizes fundraising for medical causes like Monty’s.

We fundraise in Monty’s honor and we have a small fundraising team that formed because others wanted to lend a hand. They have taken the reins and have planned fundraisers on their own to support Monty. We live in a beautiful small town where everybody knows everybody. Many have raised generations of families here in Newport (add city). Our church is supporting Monty and other churches are signing on as well. They all want to help.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

A “Comedy Night” fundraiser brought Monty’s community together

Marquise: HelpHOPELive simplifies the fundraising process and puts it on a level that is more understandable and that makes it easier for contributors to donate.

Talia: Fundraising with HelpHOPELive helps us to take care of things and keep things organized. It allows us to go through this journey without mounting expenses.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

“HelpHOPELive…allows us to go through this journey without mounting expenses.”


Transplants change lives.


Monty: To me, a transplant means an opportunity to go back to normal.

Talia: A transplant means not having to say, “Wait, Dad, do you have the extra batteries!?” Also, not having to see my dad bogged down with all this equipment connected to him so he can be more mobile on his own. It’ll be a good chance and a happy one for my dad. I want to let the donor and their family know that they are giving a gift that only they, God and the medical teams can give. Thank you for giving my dad a second chance at life.

Nicole: After transplant there will continue to be more big changes to our lives. We will find out what our new normal will be as a family, which will be one challenge. How involved we will or will not be with the donor family might be a challenge as well.  I send an entire world of thanks and gratitude to our future donor and donor family. Yours is a gift that there are no words for and thank you just doesn’t say enough. God bless you.

Monty Scott HelpHOPELive

“A transplant means an opportunity to go back to normal.”


Support Monty and his family as he waits for a lifesaving transplant at helphopelive.org. You can start a fundraiser with our nonprofit in honor of someone you know who is waiting for a transplant of any kind. Donations are tax deductible. Learn more on our website

Voices Of Hope: “No Matter What Happens, We Always Love Each Other”

Yusef Harris is a loving father and a longtime community volunteer and youth mentor. Combating health issues since 2004, Yusef needs a kidney transplant to live a long and healthy life. He and his family have turned to HelpHOPELive for fundraising support.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

Yusef is fundraising or a kidney transplant with support from his family

As he copes with the challenges of end-stage renal failure and exhausting dialysis treatments, Yusef draws inspiration from his family to stay positive and keep fighting. We asked daughters NaQari and Miyala about fundraising and sticking together as a family in the face of challenging circumstances.


How is your family helping Yusef to manage fundraising?


Miyala: We help sell shirts and do our best to promote his HelpHOPELive campaign and let others know about it. We have all purchased and worn his #LemonadeLife clothing as well! We started the #LemonadeLife hashtag with our father because, as our dad puts it, “I refuse to let kidney failure end what I know to be a meaningful life.”

NaQari: We also go out with him and educate people about kidney failure and being organ donors using HelpHOPELive brochures and bracelets.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

“When life gives you lemons…”


What are you currently fundraising for to help Yusef?


NaQari: We are currently fundraising to help cover the bills that come with the kidney transplant surgery and the medications he will need to live with a new kidney.


When did you first realize how expensive a transplant could be for your family?


Miyala: When we took time to talk about the transplant process and what we would all have to go through, we learned about the financial commitment.

NaQari: I realized the financial commitment the moment my father began to take precautions and go through all the necessary steps required for him to be a candidate for the transplant surgery. I learned about the cost mostly from my father, and I also learned through research on the Internet and heard about the financial component from people who had received a transplant who posted about it on Facebook. I was told that the anti-rejection medications would be between $200 and $300 per month for the rest of his life.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

Yusef will take on the financial burden of transplant with help from family and friends


Is your community supportive of what your family is going through?


Miyala: Everyone is there for us if we ever need anything. We have people we can count on.

NaQari: Our church family and Facebook community is very supportive. They understand that my father is going through tough circumstances and they do everything they can to help, whether that is donating or sharing my father’s story.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.


How do you feel about fundraising with HelpHOPELive?


Miyala: It’s been great. My dad talked to me about working with HelpHOPELive and what is being done to help us is wonderful.

NaQari: I love fundraising with HelpHOPELive! They provide a professional-looking site and help with the work necessary for my father to raise funds.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

NaQari appreciates that HelpHOPELive provides “help with the work necessary for my father to raise funds”


Do you think it can be difficult to stay positive while on the transplant waiting list?


Miyala: I know for a fact it’s difficult. Having to wait is hard. Your whole life depends upon what happens at that point. I just say to him and anyone else, never give up. God has a plan for you.

NaQari: It can be very difficult staying positive while on the waiting list because so much can happen. You can get an at-risk donor or someone who doesn’t match your blood type, and that makes you think more about the possible complications that come with the surgery. My advice is to pray and keep a positive spirit, because if you think positive you will have positive results.


Is it challenging to watch your father cope with a chronic health condition?


Miyala: I know that things are hard but at the same time, you never know exactly what that person is going through or feeling. You want to understand, but sometimes that’s hard. It hurts to see the pain that they go through.

NaQari: My dad had to quit working because of his health. He couldn’t work for long before he experienced pain. My dad has had small bouts of depression and he tries his best to be positive. It affects all of us because we are all so used to seeing that spark in his eye. It is difficult to watch my father cope with his health condition because I can’t experience it or take away the pain that comes with it, nor can I take away all the risks and what-ifs.


What’s the best part about being a member of your family?


Miyala: No matter what we’re going through, we’ve been taught to stick together, and that’s what we do. I always know that my dad and everyone else in my family is there for me.

NaQari: No matter what happens, we always love each other and have fun together.


Tell us a little bit about your dad’s role as a youth mentor in the community.


NaQari: My dad has mentored and become a father figure for many young men in our church community and he has helped them with everything from homework to life lessons. He loves mentoring young people because he wants to help them become wonderful men and keep them from being another statistic in their neighborhoods.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

Yusef’s community is grateful for his work in youth mentoring

It became a part of his life when these individuals were born and came to our church. On a day-to-day basis, he is doing everything he can to better himself. Then he calls or messages the individuals or their guardians or parents to check up on them to see how things are going and if he can help them in any way.


When it comes to your dad’s life, from living gracefully with a chronic condition to volunteering and mentoring at-risk youth, what are you most proud of?


Miyala: I love that my dad took his story and made it into something so positive. He wants everyone to know that life will give you lemons, but all you have to do is make lemonade. It’s never over. I just want my father to know that I am very proud of what he’s done. He has helped mold me into the young lady that I am, and I love him for that.

NaQari: Even when he doesn’t feel good, he finds a way not only to be my father but a father for other children who don’t have one. To me, that is the most selfless thing I can think of, because he provides for those children as well as us.  My dad has found a way to love his wife and two daughters unconditionally while giving the same love to many other kids at the drop of a hat. He takes care of them just like he would take care of us. I love that about my dad.

Yusef Harris HelpHOPELive

Yusef’s family and community are behind him on his transplant journey


To learn more about Yusef, NaQari and Miyala, visit helphopelive.org.  Want to help support transplant families? Make a donation to HelpHOPELive and find out what else you can do to raise awareness and support families facing a medical crisis.  

Voices of Hope: “There Is Always Someone To Lean On”

Husband and father Martin Vece has served the community for decades as a performer and teacher. We asked Marty how his wife and three daughters help him to cope with the emotional, physical and financial challenges of life on the transplant waiting list.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

Marty with his family at UCLA


In November of 2014, I was informed by my doctors at UCLA that I would need a heart transplant. Because of an impending lung issue, I would first have to go through open heart surgery for an LVAD. In December of 2014, I had to immediately relocate my entire family from Las Vegas to Los Angeles as I recovered from the procedure. I knew in that moment that we were in some incredibly deep financial trouble.

I had to remain in Los Angeles for a minimum of sixth months after the LVAD surgery. My doctors required me to have a caretaker for that entire period. We asked several members of our family to stay with me in LA, but everyone we asked was not able to do it. There was no choice but for my wife and kids to come with me.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

Marty begins walking after the LVAD surgery

When I was in the hospital getting the LVAD surgery, it was my wife who, over a period of three days, packed up all our things, rented a U-Haul truck, found housing for us in LA, took our girls out of school and registered them in LA, and found people to help her move everything we needed into an apartment. She truly was Superwoman. We were finally able to move back to Las Vegas in June of 2015.

Because Las Vegas does not have its own transplant facility, when I get ‘the call’ for a heart transplant, I will have to go on a leave of absence from work and relocate to Los Angeles again to be near UCLA for roughly six months while I recover from the surgery. I am currently fundraising to cover my medical and related expenses, including uninsured doctor’s bills and medication costs that come in monthly. With HelpHOPELive fundraising helping me to pay for medical and related costs, it frees up money to help with general bills and cost-of-living expenses so I can take care of my wife and family.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

An update on Marty’s HelpHOPELive page explains financial burdens

Chronic health issues have created multiple challenges for me and my family. The stress has been ridiculous as I cope with my health issues and my wife tries to raise three young girls and support me at the same time. The financial stress of my illness has been significant. It’s continuous, because even after the transplant my uninsured medical expenses will continue to stack up. I will have to continue to fundraise for my entire life.

With a little bit of my energy and time, I coordinate all of my fundraising activities on my own. My wife is busy taking care of the girls, taking care of me and running the household. It can be surprising when extended family members and friends don’t step up to help with fundraising. Since my heart issues have taken a turn for the worse, I have learned a lot about who in your life really sticks by you through the tough times and who abandons you.

HelpHOPELive has been a godsend. Before I started working with HelpHOPELive, I didn’t have a clue about how to conduct grassroots fundraising. I have become educated very quickly with the guidance I have received from HelpHOPELive. It really helps that the organization allows me to fundraise through a 501(c)(3). It gives your illness some credibility: HelpHOPELive verifies medical need, and I think people feel a little safer donating money with assurance that the cause is legitimate.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

HelpHOPELive lends credibility to Marty’s fundraising efforts

I find it to be a great challenge to remain positive while on the transplant waiting list. For some of us, it is a really long wait, and it becomes challenging when you are dealing with medical issues day in and day out. I honestly don’t know where I would be without my family. They keep me grounded and focused on living for each and every day. But it has not been easy. I seem to weave in and out of periodic states of depression. During those times, I just keep saying to myself that I’m lucky to be alive. Without modern technology, I would have been gone a long time ago. I try to look at what I have and what I am grateful for, not what I’m missing. Positive thinking is crucial to get you through those dark periods.

My family members, close friends and co-workers provide a strong emotional support system for me. My relationship with my wife and three daughters is incredible. They have played a tremendous role in my health journey in that they have been there with me every step of the way. I don’t know if I could get through each day dealing with all of my medical issues without them at my side.

My two oldest daughters are nine and eight years old, and they understand my medical condition and limitations very well. They help me with little things like bending over and picking things up for me, helping me carry things, or getting something for me because I’m out of breath. These little acts of assistance help me physically get through each day. My girls are great because they know that I can’t play soccer with them, roughhouse, or do anything else on that physical level, so instead, we take advantage of other ways to spend quality time together. We do homework together, play board games, watch TV and go for slow walks together.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

Marty’s wife and daughters are a strong source of support

The best part about my family is our love for each other. We all support one another. No matter what is going on, there is always someone to lean on. My advice to a new father is, don’t think you can be selfish. To be a good father, you have to be willing to make sacrifices for your children. When I was little, my mother used to say, “I go without so you can have [what you need]. I would take the food out of my own mouth to put it in yours.” My mother had a great impact on me and now that I am a father, I truly understand what she meant.

After transplant, I look forward to getting out of the house. I want to run and run and run and run. I can’t wait to do physical activities again. I want to play sports and do musical theater and chase my kids around for hours. I want to go into the ocean and splash around with my family. I want to take dance classes with my girls. My girls and my family are my world. It’s hard to imagine, now, that I had a life before they arrived.

Martin Vece HelpHOPELive heart transplant

Marty wants to run, play sports and chase his kids around after transplant


Learn more about Marty and his family or donate in his honor at helphopelive.org. Help us celebrate strong fathers this month! Do you know a father who is living with a challenging chronic health condition? Submit his name to HelpHOPELive and he could be featured in our next Blog post!

Voices Of Hope: It’s Been One Year Since My Heart Transplant

Avid cyclist Bill Soloway was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy in the 1990s. The debilitating effects of the condition forced him to cut back on his favorite hobbies and his career as a skilled craftsman. Exactly one year ago, Bill received a lifesaving heart transplant. Here are Bill’s thoughts on fundraising with HelpHOPELive and finding your new normal after transplant.

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill got a heart transplant one year ago today


How is your relationship with your family?


I have a very supportive fiancée, Kathy; my 86-year-old father, John; and my 23-year-old daughter, Amanda. They have been with me every step of the way. I am also very blessed to be surrounded by many close friends with whom I have ridden my bicycle over the years. I consider them my second family.

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill says family and friends support him “every step of the way”


How has your family played a role in your health journey?


Kathy has done most of the heavy lifting along with my cycling friends. They accompanied me to my medical appointments and made sure I had everything that I needed. They would stop over and spend time with me. My father lives over an hour away so we video chatted a lot when I was in the hospital, and Amanda would tag along when she could to offer support.

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill’s fiancee and friends have “done most of the heavy lifting”


Is your community helping you to fundraise?


A very close friend of mine, Dennis Brown, along with a handful of other friends lead the charge when it comes to fundraising. I am currently fundraising for the costly medications and other post-transplant medical expenses that aren’t covered by insurance.

I have had two successful fundraisers so far: Spin For Soloway, a spin-a-thon held at a gym in which I am an indoor cycling instructor; and Pizza For A Purpose, held at a favorite local restaurant where a percentage of food sales were donated to my campaign.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.


How do you feel about fundraising with HelpHOPELive?


HelpHOPELive has been very supportive in helping me achieve my fundraising goals. Everyone who I have come into contact with has taken the time to get to know me and understand my fundraising needs. They have provided fundraising ideas and marketing materials for my events, and they have also provided new ideas to help promote my cause.

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill says HelpHOPELive has helped him achieve his fundraising goals

After considering several online fundraising sites, HelpHOPELive was the only one I connected with. A coordinator spoke with me and Kathy on the phone at great length about all of the resources available and how to best use certain features on the HelpHOPELive website. I felt that my Fundraising Coordinator took a personal interest in me, and I didn’t get that with any of the other fundraising platforms that I looked into. HelpHOPELive staff have even come out to support me at one of my events since their offices are very close to my area! What an awesome surprise!


What is the biggest change to your life since your transplant?


New life, new set of rules! Dealing with medications and side effects has been a challenge, and so has being immunosuppressed. Having a new heart that is getting used to this body and allowing my body to get used to the heart is challenging as well. I will be celebrating this transplant “first birthday” with my family and all my friends with a big barbecue!

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill says his life post-transplant comes with a “new set of rules”


Is it challenging to manage a chronic health condition while being a father?


I think it’s a challenge to manage a chronic health condition or transplant, period! Being a father just adds more stress because you have to worry about more than just yourself.


What’s the best part about being a dad?


The best part is watching your kids grow up and sharing life experiences with them. You get to share in their successes and their struggles. They grow up quick! My advice to new dads is to take lots of pictures and spend lots of time doing things you like to do together as they grow up or you’ll have no memories to talk about when they get older. Plus, you’ll have a lot of good stories and adventures to tell your grandkids about their parents!

Bill Soloway HelpHOPELive

Bill tells dads to “take lots of pictures” and prioritize time with kids


Check in on Bill’s life after transplant at helphopelive.org. If you want to learn more about family support and fundraising possibilities before and after a lifesaving transplant, click or tap the Follow button to get emailed when we release new Blog posts. 

My Life As A Father And Grandfather Who Needs A Transplant

Kappy Pease is a father and grandfather living with a severe lung disease. He is on the waiting list for a lifesaving double lung transplant. We asked Kappy about his perspective on balancing fatherhood and the challenges of life on the transplant waiting list.


Why Fundraising Works For Us


Since my first visit to the hospital where a social worker suggested we begin a fundraiser to help us with the costs of transplantation, my family has come together and has been very helpful in their efforts to work with HelpHOPELive. So far, because of their dedication, we have been very successful.

Each of my kids has taken time out of their busy life to take some of the burden off of my wife, Theresa, and I, both physically and emotionally. They have each stepped up in their own way and have been very supportive. I know I could not do this without all of them.

Kappy Pease HelpHOPELive

“I could not do this without all of them.”

Although my insurance will cover most of the transplant procedure, there are many hidden and unexpected costs not covered. The expenses begin long before the procedure takes place and they last a lifetime, including travel, lodging, parking and food during countless hospital visits and the unpaid time off that my wife will take in order to care for me after the procedure. Most of all, fundraising will help contribute to the cost of the (antirejection) medications I will need to take for the rest of my life after the transplant.

I have found that much of the support I receive comes from old friends who have learned about my time of need through social media and our HelpHOPELive campaign. Working with HelpHOPELive has been a very positive experience. Their knowledge and support has been very helpful to someone who had no prior experience with fundraising.

Kappy Pease HelpHOPELive

HelpHOPELive provided custom fundraising materials and more.


How My Family Supports Me


It has been very rewarding to watch my kids grow and begin to start their own families. I am very proud to say that they have each become very successful in their own way. I’m humbled by the compliments I have received about my kids. The way they have stepped up for me during this time makes me feel like my wife and I raised an amazing family.

Kappy Pease HelpHOPELive

Family members “have stepped up for me during this time.”

At this point in my life, I feel closer to my kids than ever before. Before my diagnosis, I worked very long hours that caused me to miss out on a lot of my five kids’ daily lives and activities. I especially missed getting to watch their sports games, because sports are something that are very special to both me and my kids.

I feel that the physical limitations of my disease have been more challenging as a grandfather than as a father. My kids are adults now, and they need me more as an advisor and a part of their emotional support system.

Kappy Pease HelpHOPELive

A transplant will help Kappy spend more quality time with his grandkids.

Since my diagnosis, I have been given the chance to spend more time with all of them and grow closer to them; however, because of my disease, there are also many things we still cannot do together. The hardest part is my limited ability to play with my very young grandchildren. Once I get the transplant, I will hopefully be able to do many things that I have missed doing for the last 10 years. That includes golfing, hunting, fishing, playing with my grandkids and taking long walks with my wife.

My advice for a new father is, enjoy every moment because they grow up way too fast.

Kappy Pease HelpHOPELive

“Enjoy every moment” Kappy advises new fathers.


Learn more about Kappy or donate in his honor at helphopelive.org. If you know a father who needs help fundraising for a transplant, reach out to us today to learn how you can help.